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He is not a model by any means, but his smile exudes a warmth that draws in just about anyone.He is going out tonight, and so Fernando takes his time getting ready.While celibacy limits physical intimacy, it can expand the limits of emotional and spiritual intimacy. Keogh and Susan Beardsell at the 11th International Conference on AIDS, the sexual activity of newly diagnosed men was examined.

People have used different ways to avoid actually saying the words "I am HIV-positive" to someone they care about and would like to become intimate with -- emotionally or physically.The continuing prejudice against people with HIV/AIDS necessitates this secrecy; it is because of this that the gathering resembles gay parties before the sexual revolution of the 1960s."I am a very bad boy," says Fernando as he begins his story about why he has three boyfriends.Slicked back and cut short above his ears, his inky black hair is thinning.His black moustache looks as if it bridges his face.Every day that he does not disclose, his fear of rejection doubles and triples.He hears in his head the surprise and shock: "What!?! " The longer he keeps it a secret, the harder it is to break the silence.Tonight Fernando is attending a Monthly Social for HIV-positive men.These socials are reminiscent of apartment parties hosted by gay men and lesbians during the 1920s and 1930s.More than once a potential lover has hugged and kissed him, saying "It's all right, we can still be friends." Then they never called back.Fernando has quite a few friends, and he certainly doesn't need friends who do not call back, so he fears putting himself in a situation where he can be hurt like that again.


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